Edit-Ability

I can't begin to express how much having good friends is a value. The last week I have been realizing and attempting to change certain "undesirable" qualities, in various areas of my life. My marriage and my work perception. Now I have always been able to take advice from people, and receive a little constructive criticism, but this week was a little unbearable.

I was having an issue with my wife only 3 weeks into being married and was beginning to feel like a quick failure. I brought the issue to my small group, expecting to hear a "quick fix" or an "easy way out," but realized that was definitely not the case, instead it was brought to my attention rather abruptly, that instead of attempting to fix the problem, I should reflect on my habits and what I could do better. Not what I wanted to hear, but I accepted it.

Second, because I tend to look for ways to improve my performance, attitude and other areas of my personality constantly while working. A friend confronted me on how my perception can be heading the wrong direction. He was very upfront, blunt, and straight to the point, the way I like it. (Except when I'm on the receiving end.) Because I was taken aback by the statement, I began feeling pretty bad about myself and became a little frantic on how to change very quickly. So I called another peer to talk it out. He offered great encouragement and advice on how to change this area of my life. Which I am very glad to say I have listened to.


I read a while back about having edit-ability, by Mark Waltz. It is a great concept based on allowing your peers to look into your life and help you change specific things, as opposed to just being a support system. It has become a very important attribute to learn, not only for my own application but to begin to be an "Editor" for my wife, and other close friends.

Now not everyone needs to be blunt and incredibly straight forward, (my friends are because I tend to need that). But we do need people who will help us become better Christ followers by changing out lives. So if you don't have someone to fill this role in your life, FIND ONE, at least one, or as many as you can. You will be amazed at the amount of growth you will see in your life. If you do have these people, praise God for them and thank them next time you see them.

But because both of my friends read my blog I'll do it here. Thank you Rick and Luke for being blunt when necessary, and caring enough to follow through.

Is High School Ministry DEAD?

Recently I was hanging out with a friend and the topic of our High School Ministry came up, one phrase in particular that caught my attention was "High School Ministry is dead, but no one wants to admit it."

I cant begin to tell you how much I disagree with that statement. High School is not dead, it may be dying in many places but it is not dead. That statement would be like me telling another person "the Church is dead," that would never happen, the reason High School ministry is dying is because it hasn't changed in a long time. Its not relevant to today's youth, all students do these days is text and IM. They can get stimulated by 5 different conversations at once, so the need for a personal connection has changed. A high school service should include this part of todays culture, and so much more.

Our adult service has said "We wont say it Sunday if you cant use it Monday," the same goes for a student, they can come to church but if they don't hear anything that invokes life change and is applicable, they wont want or need to come back. To often when I was in high school (only 3 years ago) did I attend a church service and never use anything I learned the following day at school.

In order for a high school service to "survive" they need to begin to change in these areas and many more. How whould one go about this?

Forcing Change

Its amazing how much we can become unsatisfied with where we are. Unsatisfied with money, (or the lack there of) salary, friends, success, or even our faith. My biggest struggle is probably with the money area. I don't know why, but I tend to directly relate my value to how much money i have in the bank, and how much the company I work for pays me.

This flaw can very easily be frustrating in any scenario, with any job. But can be extremely tough in a ministry role and while working at a church.

I was recently given the opportunity to lead an area in ministry at EastLake, and not even 3 weeks in, I am doubting if the amount of work being put in, is worth it. (According to my value) Here are a few things I have learned.

God values me. - Even if I feel no value in what I do or where I work, God walues what I am doing for His kingdom.

Family values me. - It really doesn't matter how much I do or don't make. My wife love me no matter what.

Friends value me. - Now this isn't always the case, but if the amount of money you make or the success you have is the main factor for the friends you have. Get new friends, they all like me whether I am broke or not.

What other areas do I need to grow in?

I know that in money it affects me, but this also hits me with my spiritual growth. I can attempt to force growth in my walk, but there is a reason why Elders have there name, because they have lived it out, and learned along the way. I cant cram all of the knowledge they have into my 20 year old brain. It wouldn't work. So I really just need to slow down and get better at pacing myself in my growth.

Bottom Line:
I have realized that all of my needs will be taken care of, no matter what.

The only catch is: It's not on my time, it's God's.

Another Tuesday Night

Small Group is amazing! Tons of learning taking place, not only by the "new believers," but by everyone, myself especially. If you don't know me personally, I tend to talk a lot.... A lot, a lot....
Hence the blog. Anyways, I have learned to shut up and let other people talk.

I love being surrounded by people who aren't perfect, people who are just, well, people. They are letting there guard down and I'm reciprocating.

We are planning on doing a group community project sometime soon. I really want to adopt a llama! But I think everyone else is leaning towards the HUGS direction or just helping our local community. I can't wait to get these things rolling, and see how God is going to affect us all by serving other people. I can't wait to see our group take serving to the next level and get other people involved as well.

This just seems to be a great beginning to friendships and growth!

Ever Wish?

You could be really good at something without ever practicing or trying? I do, as lazy as it may make me sound, I wish I never had to practice at music. I wish I had perfect pitch and could play anything just by hearing it once. I was watching the movie August Rush today (mt favorite movie) and it just so happened to re-kindle my love for music. I have always loved music and playing, but have been very focused on other things i.e. wedding, so its been put on the back burner.

I really feel like I should get back on it. It turns out I actually have more time on my hands with not having to drive home at 11 every night. I still practice every so often, but would like to on a regular basis. It would feel pretty good to get back up on stage of some form and play in front of people since its been a while.

I just started volunteering in the High School Group at EastLake and they seem to want and need more musicians, I love the bass guitar so I think thats where I'll start.

Moving Forward

A lot of things took place today, none of which were actually on my list of things to get done. Today was one of those days that you have a long list, then a million other things come up, and you feel like (or in fact there was) no progress being made on said list. I've been told that the 80/20 rule should apply here, 80% of the work you do should be planned and you should leave the other 20% for things that come up. So how do I get better at managing my time and ensuring the 20% doesn't become 100%.

Here is how. (Granted stuff happens that you just have to deal with.)

1.) Have an estimated plan or agenda for the day. (If my day is outlined and I am chipping away at my list, it will keep me focused and not allow "unnecessary" things to come up.)

2.) Better manage the 20% that comes up. (Can this be handled by someone else? Are they available to take this on?)

3.) Evaluate if the 20% is even fitting for my area. (Often when we are the "nice guy" and do things for people we never get anything we want done accomplished.)

4.) No matter what happens, Keep Moving Forward. (If I sit and complain about how long something is taking, it takes longer, just knock it out and move on.)

Any other ideas? Let me know!

My Other Love

I have 2 loves.... according to my wife, one is her, and the other?

My Cell Phone!

I'm always on the thing, its just so cool, I mean if my wife would get automatic updates on both my email accounts and get google maps, I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off her either!

We were walking into Trader Joe's today (cool place), and I was talking to a friend, when I got the look, an implied, get off the stupid phone and help me find dinner, look. What is it about this thing that has me so addicted. Personally I think its because I'm such a social person that I like to be connected with other people at the same time.

Here in lies the problem, my wife happens to be the quality time love language, so, for me to talk on the phone while doing a task, often puts her at second place automatically in her book. So how do I remain connected to people I love to talk to, and keep my wife at the number 1 spot?

1) I guess I have to figure out what things are appropriate at certain times, I could have called the friend back, after we got out of the store.

2) After just leaving work, put my phone away for an hour or longer to give her my undivided attention.

If you have any more ideas for a young, newly married man, feel free to let me know.

Small Group

We had our first night at our new small group, it was amazing. We had some great fellowship, and opened up with some prayer, the host (Luke) got us started on our topic, the book of Luke. We had 4 different types of bibles, and began to read through the first chapter.

It was great, a ton of learning took place, we made it through the first 38 verses in 2 hours. God made His presence felt, we were all getting very in depth.

We had a few somewhat new believers and some life long believers, a great mix. The feeling after was ecstatic, we closed by listening to a worship tune, and some more prayer.

I am very excited to go back for the next 6 weeks, and my wife an I have made a commitment to not miss a single week.

Partnership Rocks

Its amazing how much my wife influences me and my decisions (Even with only being married 11 days). Its truly a blessing. I have been feeling uncommitted to the cause of Church Cleanliness lately, its been tough, its a job that never ends, its always needs more, there is always a "new project" or "big emergency" every day of the week.

I have been feeling like what I do is not really a ministry position, that I don't really affect life change. "WRONG!"

A great phrase she used was "every person who affects the look and feel of the church is involved in ministry," and what a true statement that is.

I am a minister.

An so is every other person who works with me, for me, or above me. We are all making a difference in the view someone has of our church home. By picking up the trash or repainting the walls, we are allowing "attenders" and "first time guest" to not be distracted, and to be able to focus on what God is planning to in there hearts for that day.

I am very fortunate and blessed to be in this position, or in any ministry position, and to have a wife who is open to what God has to say.

Same Team!

A few days back I was watching a live video feed from the Whiteboard Conference. One of the speakers showed a baptism video after he spoke. It was a great video, very heart warming, and well put together. While watching the video I had a great realization.

We Are All On The Same Team!

Often times, we can get the feeling of wanting to "out do" other churches, to make our services more appealing, get more volunteers, have a bigger attendance, produce our own curriculum. All of these things are great to move towards, but these thoughts are often self-centered.

I loved watching the video because I just showed that whether a church of 100 or 10,000, we all have the same goal and often produce the same results. Whether baptizing 1 or 100 is still a win for God!

Time Off

Who does that? Seriously? Being a part of ministry is often little personal time and loads of "church on the brain." I have two more days and I'm struggling with not getting back to work.

Everyone I have talked to has said to relax and take time, but what about ministry makes this so hard? I think that because we are doing work for God, we feel a since of responsibility to never stop, never let up, and to keep going, often sacrificing our own sanity and mental health.

This vacation has been a blessing, I have spent more time digging into the Bible and praying, then while working. I have gotten to enjoy the company of my wife, learn and grow with her.

So for anyone feeling stunted in their growth, take some time. It will work.

So much to do?

Its funny talking to people about getting married. I keep hearing how crazy it will be the last week. How mush stress it will put on us as a couple, and how it will be the first big thing to argue about. Not really my findings, its only 3 days till the wedding, and honestly, we don't have much to do. We have been very relaxed and even took the day to ourselves and went to the San Diego Wild Animal Park. (A great start for vacation?)

The reason for little stress. Delegation! It's been nice having people to delegate things out to, I think that is why we don't have much to do. We have list upon list of things for people to do, and those lists are filling up with names. I think the day of, will be a breeze, I just need to not drop the ring, and say I do!

So if you re planning on getting married, and have a ton of people coming, INCLUDE THEM!!! They are more than willing to help out. Just Ask! I have actually found that the more time I spend on getting other people to help and do things for us; The more we get done entirely and the more time I have on my hands. Who would of thunk it?


What's Next? Obviously the Wedding.